November, 2011


14
Nov 11

Germany thanks the southerners

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Angela Merkel today gratefully acknowledged the southern European contribution to the euro. “Without the incorporation of those sunny southerners, the euro would be the deutschmark. It would have reached Swiss franc levels, ruining our exports,” she stated, while munching on sardinas at the opening of the Museum of Greek Siestas & Tax Evasion. “Instead, we have this delightfully devalued deutschmark, which has allowed our trade surplus to reach a three year high.”

As she flicked the tail of her flamenco-inspired suit, she thanked Germany’s fellow members in the EU and the Eurozone for being responsible for nearly two thirds of the country’s foreign trade. “Vielen Dank for being less competitive than us and buying our goods,” said Merkel, as she headed off for a week’s holiday in the newly opened Deutsche Acropolis Hotel in Athens.

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